Attack of the Wedgie

One thing I have learned in living with cavemen is that you have to constantly be on guard. The littlest caveman has somewhere learned about the wedgie. Which is too bad for the rest of us. He thinks it is hilarious when he can give any one of us a wedgie. He likes to catch us in our weakest moments. He seeks the most opportune time for a major wedgie. Such as when I'm doing dishes and have both my hands in the sink full of soapy water, or when I'm taking dinner out of the oven, or when I'm taking things out of the freezer, or perhaps when I'm standing on my tip toes reaching something out of the cupboard. This is when he strikes. I seem to be the prime victim of the wedgies. The other two cavemen will come to my rescue though. Then they'll give the wedgie giving caveman a wedgie and it turns into one big wedgie fest.

That's ok...I have pictures of them that I will show their girlfriends someday. A mother's revenge is some times the best revenge.

Daycare Xmas party

Tonight was the daycare Xmas party. It snowed all day long today and was cold, so it would have been nice to just stay inside. But we drudged ourselves out. Kevin wanted to stay home. He didn't want to be with a bunch of 2 and 3 year olds. He is 10 now and so grown up for that sort of thing. LOL... He acts like 2 and 3 year old children are from another planet. They possibly very well may be, but he forgets he was that age once.

Sam & I were headed out. I couldn't find my cell phone, so I tried to call it from my home phone before I left. Our phone was dead. I checked all the other phones to make sure none of them were off the hook. None of them were. I told Kevin I wasn't going to leave him home alone for a couple hours with out being able to call out in case of an emergency. He didn't want to go. He was afraid no one would be there his age and he didn't want to spend his evening with a bunch of babies. I told him we'd go drop off the presents and be right back.

We got to the party and Sam didn't want to come home. I couldn't get through to the cable company to find out how long the phones would be out or what was going on. High call volume is what their hold background kept saying. So I came home and got Kevin and took him to the party. I grabbed a present from underneath the tree for him to have at the party, since all the other kids were doing a gift exchange. So he wouldn't be left out of receiving a gift. Good thing I got them lots of presents this year. I told him he'd have fun as there were kids there his age. They were the older siblings of the little ones that go to daycare. Ok, well, he decided that wouldn't be so bad.

I had a hard time getting that kid to leave! Both boys had a great time. Our daycare lady is so wonderful. She gave all the kids that go to her a present. The kids made special gifts for the parents. She even gave each family a personalized Xmas tree ornament.

The kids had fun, the grown ups had fun, and the food was delicious!

Now we are home relaxing. Our phone is working, so that is a good thing.

More Christmas Shopping

This year my youngest caveman has been the most excited about Christmas as he ever has been in whole life of 9 years. So I couldn't be a grinch this year. Last night I ventured out and did some more shopping. I scored big time too. My little cavemen will have so many presents to open.

I even got the hubby a few things so he'll have more than just the credit card bill to open for Christmas. And of course I even bought a couple of little goodies for yours truly. I mean, I have to have something to open on Christmas morning too.

I'm officially done getting ready for Christmas

Tonight I bought the last of all the Christmas presents. I didn't think I'd be spending much money. WRONG! My cart was spilling over the top. So it will be a happy Xmas at our house.

Today we put up the Christmas tree, decorated it, and Ken hung up all the outdoor & window lights. It looks so festive. The kids decorated pretty much the whole tree. I just went and moved the ornaments and spread them out a bit. Sam made me two ornaments at daycare, so he was happy to put those on the tree. We have one of those artificial pre-lit trees. That is SO nice. I hated stringing the lights on the tree. I'd get dizzy going around and around the tree and then trying to keep them evenly spaced was a chore too. So I'm really loving the pre-lit tree. And so far the cats have been staying out of the tree.

The kids are so excited for Christmas. They just want lots of presents and two weeks off from school. Such the life. It's great to be a kid.

Well, I got my Christmas present early. I got a Nikon D80 digital camera with lens kit. It's my dream camera. The camera to end all cameras. I LOVE it. It's wonderful and I'm still trying to figure out all the gadgets it has. Right now I've discovered close up (still learning on that one) and automatic. It takes amazing photos. I have my manual and I have a feeling I'll be reading it more than once. I couldn't wait until Christmas though, I had to open it up early and try it out.

The hubby gets the credit card bill for all the Xmas shopping. I'm so glad I could give him that gift. Which is pretty good considering he doesn't have to shop for or wrap any gifts. I think that's a fair trade.

Got My Passport

Today I got my passport done. It was a most amusing experience.

I walked into the building about 15 minutes before they closed. I grabbed my number and waited my turn. There were two ladies working there, but only one of them could process passports. Why I don't know? It wasn't a difficult process. In fact, I'm sure a caveman could even do it.

The lady with the foreign accent was the one doing passports. Now, that's a bit ironic. I gave her all my paperwork. I didn't have my father's birth date on the form, so she asked me for that. I told her I didn't know, and that he is deceased. Well, she still needed his year anyway. I told her I didn't know. She told me to guess. Well, if I have to guess at it, then why is it so important? Then she saw his age on my birth certificate and she figured out that he was born in 1928. Ok, that sounds good. Sure, lets put that down. I don't know what my father's date of birth has to do with getting a passport and proving that I'm a US citizen. I'm 40 years old and I only have to prove citizenship because I'm trying to go outside of the country I was born in. Well, I thought that is why I provided them with a certified birth certificate and my drivers license. So, sure my dad was born in 1928.

She decides the passport application is complete, so then it is time to take my picture. We go over to the picture area and I stand in front of the white background placard. She is holding the camera and then tells me to move over to my left. Why would I move to the left when I am standing in the center of the background and she is the one with the camera? Who am I to argue? I move to my left. Then she tells me to move to the right. Here? Here? Here? Ok...she takes the picture. She shows me the picture and I tell her ok, cuz I don't want to have to move, move, move again. At least I'm smiling in it and I don't look like I just robbed a bank.

We went back to the counter and she inspected my drivers license. She couldn't tell if the 6 on my drivers license was a 6 or a 5. Was I born in 1968 or 1958. Well, lets see my birth certificate says 1968 and my passport application says 1968. I don't look 40, let alone I do certainly not look 50. Good grief woman! So she still can't make it out, tells me she needs glasses. She asks me if I have a copy of my birth certificate. I told her, "No, you have my certified copy". So she makes me a copy. She tells me I should have 2 copies. One for my house, and one to carry with me. She told me I should have 2 copies of all legal identification forms. One at my house and one to carry with me. Yeah, that's a good idea. Carry all forms of ID on me. Now if that's not screaming "Hey identity thieves, come and get me!!" I don't know what is. I tell her ok, thanks for the copies, I'll do that. I'm not going to argue with a government worker 10 minutes before closing time.

She makes a copy of my drivers license, but she blows it up so it takes up the whole page of an 8x11 sheet of printer paper. Then she decides that indeed that it does say 1968, not 1958. Oh, I'm glad we got that cleared up.

After the whole process is done, she has me raise my right hand. I had to solemnly swear that I didn't use a fake drivers license, fake birth certificate, or fill out bad information on my passport application. I guess if you exclude my father's birth date, then yes, I didn't lie or give you phony identification. Because getting a certified copy of your birth certificate is a pain in the ass, why would I get any body else's but my own? I also had to swear that the picture she took of me indeed is me and looks like me. Well, I didn't see my twin in this office, so I'm pretty sure that the picture she took of me and attached to my paperwork is indeed me.

Then I had to pay. I had one check left in my checkbook. I figured that would do the trick. Nope, you have to write 2 checks. So I wrote one check, and paid cash for the other portion. Apparently the money goes to two different places and they can't separate it out.

After all this it is time for me to go. The whole process took about a half an hour. Two people walked in their office after closing time. The foreign passport lady was still working with me, so the other lady pulled the numbers. The foreign lady asked who was next. A lady stepped up to the counter and the foreign lady says "What number do you have?" The lady states she has no number. "Back of the line you go, you don't have a number, you go to the end of the line." The only other customer standing in the office besides me and the lady with no number was a gentleman and he had a number. So the foreign lady decided he could get service first. He declined and told her to help the lady first. The foreign lady didn't like that much. Then the guy pipes up loudly and says "One thing, make sure you always grab a number first in a place like this. What ever you do, you better get a number." I snickered to myself and was glad I was done, because this did not make the foreign, passport, lady who needed glasses, and was working past closing time not very happy.

I left to go home and hope I get my passport and returned certified copy of my birth certificate in the mail in a few weeks. I'm just glad they last 10 years.

Washing Machine Woes

I received this note today from a good friend of mine. She told me on Tues that she had washing machine woes. This is the update that she sent me about her problem getting fixed. It is quite hilarious.
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So on Monday when I was doing laundry and my washing machine was done with a load, I went to move the clothes from the washer to the dryer. However, the washing machine was still full of water and my clothes floating. I turned the dial some and it would start pouring more water in, never draining. So I call Pete and tell him he needs to come over on Tuesday after work and fix it. He comes over, turns the dial, it starts up and all cocky, he says to me "it's fixed" and goes back downstairs. I said "no it's not". Then it stops (thankfully not putting more water in this time).

Well, we can't pull it out with all that water in it, so we have to empty the water out of the washer, one bucket at a time, then put my clothes in the tub (thankfully my washer is upstairs right out side my bathroom). Pete squeezes his not-so-tiny beer gut behind the washer to shut the water off then back out to take the hose off. I grab a cake pan to catch any excess water. Well, there was about four cake pans worth of excess water and about 1/2 a gallon of that got on the floor. Next thing I know all the smoke detectors are going off in my house and we're still trying to get all the water running out of the machine. He turns to me and says "did you turn the oven off?" I said "yeah" then went downstairs to see what was going on, only to find water running out of smoke detector! The water that ran out of the washer ran through my Pergo flooring, through the ceiling and out the only hole it could find, which happened to be my smoke detector.

We still can't let the hose go because there is still excess water, so I go back upstairs, hold the hose and Pete takes the upstairs detector off so we don't go deaf. He then goes downstairs to remove the one down there and I hear this scream. He got electrocuted/shocked. He comes back up, we finish getting the water out of the washer and he pulls the pump apart and pulls out two pieces of wire with hair and crap wrapped around them. He starts accusing me that it's one of my hair pieces (typical man has no idea what those look like). And I'm arguing with him that it's not. A few minutes later, as he's putting the machine back together, I started laughing my ass off - it was the underwire from one of my bras, broke in two pieces, LOL!!! The really funny part, I haven't lost an underwire in one of my bras in over three years, so that thing has been living in there ever since trying to kill my washer!

Moral of the story - check your bras when you take them out of the washer, ladies!

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Good thing I don't wear underwire bras. Not only do they twist in the wash and stab you in the arm pits, but they break washing machines too.

Also, it is wise to use a nylon wash bag for under garments.

And why do men always blame womens hair accessories for mysterious happenings?

Airline Trolls

Saturday on our flight home, I didn't check in online until Saturday morning. They pre-assigned our seats and they were totally not together at all. We were pretty spaced apart. So we got to the airport early and checked in at the counter. At which point they charged me $45 for my luggage. We all had just 1 a piece. Such a load of crap. So I tell them that we need seats together. The agent tried and she said "for whatever reason it's not letting me reassign you, you'll have to check with the boarding gate."

So when they start boarding we get in line so that we are ahead and I tell him. He says to check with the flight attendants.

We are one of the first ones on the plane & I ask the flight attendant what to do. She looks at all 3 of my tickets and says "Go sit in row 22 and then when the other people come to sit there have them trade with you".

So we do that. Well here comes row 22 people. A young couple last ones on the plane. So they look at me & tell me I'm in their seats. So I ask them if they wouldn't mind sitting in our assigned seats cuz I have to be with my kids and this is what the main flight lady said for me to do. So they look at me like I'm crazy. So then troll flight attendant #2 comes over and says "what's the problem here". The young couple says. She's in our seats, cuz she has to be with her kids but we want to sit together.

Troll #2 says to me. "You can't just take their seats, you have to ask them if they will trade. They don't have to trade if they don't want to."

I tell her what troll #1 had told me. So off she marches.

Troll #1 & now troll #3 come to me. Troll #1 who told me to sit here says "I never told you that. I told you to sit in your assigned seats and then find somebody to trade with."

The young couple says "well, if you can find us seats together we'd really like that, but you can't kick her out of these seats, she has to be with her kids. We aren't going to make them split up"

Troll #3 says "Well, get to your seats, we are ready to go."

So I get up and start looking for people to rearrange since the 3 trolls obviously can't handle to do their job and want me and the boys to split up and totally not be anywhere near each other for a 4 hour flight. So the trolls are glaring at me like it's all my fault. Troll #1 finds a guy where there are two empty seats next to and says "Would you mind having this couple sit with you because this lady took their seats".

He says yeah and all is happy except for the 3 trolls.

Then during the flight one of trolls was going through the aisle with her cart. She gets it stuck on the seat in front of me and starts yelling "Excuse me! Excuse me! Excuse me!" So I lean over to see what her problem is & see that she is stuck on the seat. So I sit back up and she gets it unstuck and then just glares at me.

Later on the other troll brought the drink cart through and she starts shouting "Do you want anything to drink? Do you want anything to drink?" I wake up cuz she's shouting this & Sam is asleep. Sam wakes up and it turns out she is shouting this at Sam. So I snap back at her and say "No, he doesn't want anything to drink, he's sleeping. Thanks for waking him up." So she glares at me & then doesn't even ask me if I want anything to drink. Then the whole rest of the flight I just got evil looks when they walked by. Trolls!!

Kevin took a picture of each of the trolls. They were old, fat, ugly, and crabby. If you're rude and your butt hits the seats as you walk down the aisle then you should maybe find another line of work!

I'm going to call the customer service line & complain. I tried today, but their line was too busy all day and it kept sending me to voice mail. I guess they have too many people complaining.